Some famous quotes on
the M-word:
I recently read that love is entirely
a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic
waste.
Bob Newhart
The great question that I have
never been able to answer...is 'What do women want.'
Freud
Nothing says lovin' like marrying
your cousin!
Al Bundy
I'm an excellent housekeeper.
Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.
Zsa Zsa
Gabor
Prescription for a happy marriage:
Whenever you're wrong, admit it, whenever you're right, shut up.
Ogden Nash
Eighty percent of married men
cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.
Jackie
Mason
Two women came before wise King
Solomon, dragging between them a young man in a three-piece suit.
"This young lawyer agreed to marry my daughter." said one.
"No! He agreed to marry MY daughter!
said the other.
And so they haggled before the
king until he called for silence.
"Bring me my biggest sword" said
Solomon "and I shall chop the young man in half." "That way each
may have half for their daughter to marry."
"Sounds good to me," said the
first lady.
But the other said "Sire, Do
not spill his blood. The other's daughter may
wed him."
The wise king did not hesitate
a moment...
"The attorney will marry the
first lady's daughter!" he proclaimed.
"But she was willing to chop
him in two!" exclaimed his court.
"Indeed," said Solomon, wise
as he was. "that shows she is the true
Mother-in-Law!"
A man wanted to buy his wife a
really special present for their anniversary, 'Dear, to show you
how much I love you, you may pick out anything you desire for your present
this year.'
He suggested diamonds, furs,
an exotic trip. None of these pleased his wife. At a loss,
he asked his wife what SHE would like. She responded that she wanted
a divorce. 'But darling', he replied, 'I really hadn't planned on
spending THAT much'.
Sent in by a contributor:
My sister Liz had planned a backyard
wedding ceremony at her new in-laws place. The yard was scenic, to
say the least. It had a backyard pool, gorgeous trees and landscaping
galore! The aisle was a beautiful red carpet
that went up the length of the
yard. Everything was picture perfect!
I was the maid-of-honour and
my three year old son was the ring-bearer. His duties were simple...walk
up the red carpet and stand next to "Uncle Bob".
The videos were rolling, the
Groom was in position, and Richard started his long walk. He looked
adorable in his cumberbund and bowtie and everything seemed to be going
off without a hitch...or so we thought! Halfway up the aisle, Richards
attention seemed to wander, he started looking to the side and before we
knew it he was off and running! There was a swingset in one corner
of the yard, complete with a slide! (Richards favourite) He was up
the ladder and down the slide in no time and continued his trek down the
aisle.
Best of all...it was all captured
on video!
Maggie
Do you have a cute story that
happened at your wedding?
Send your submissions to Bridalzine
and watch for them to appear
in our humour column!
Submissions should be sent to:
Bridalzine@hugkiss.com
We look forward to your stories!!
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Your
comments, suggestions and feedback are always welcome! Send in your
pictures, stories and anecdotes and you could be featured in Bridalzine
Submit your entries to bridalzine@hugkiss.com
We
would love to feature YOU!! We need brides and grooms for our Proposal
Section...For our Brides Diary...and your participation is always welcome
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